one of the first things i did in my university dorm room was hang coloured twinkle lights from the ceiling.
to this day, some of my favourite memories are of that year. mostly in the winter when we’d gather on the window sill, or huddle into my tiny single bed and look out at the freshly fallen snow, talking well into the wee hours of the morning about nothing and everything. ours was the biggest room, so it was a natural gathering place. a room with a view.
whenever it’s the first snowfall of the year, i think about that year and midnight snowball fights. too drunk, or happy, to feel the cold night air. time stood still in the silence of it all.
i think that’s what i miss the most, the silence. the silence you can only appreciate when you’re being loud.
now everything is loud, but through external forces.
work. expectations. the grocery list. bills. life.
it gets so loud, piling worlds on top of each other, not to mention the promises.
i want the silence to scream through.
even then, i’m not sure you’d listen.