Flying Buttresses

i never have, nor ever will i be persuaded to jump into the dance and play the can’t-call-first-must-wait-48-hours-to-reply-he-said-she-said-i-was-picked-last-for-dodgeball game, when it comes to dating. no desire to play and cause drama for the sake of it all.

yet my friends here are all about the games with the boys they meet. in some ways i feel like i skipped over parts of my youth, as i was never like that when i was younger. maybe its because meeting people is hard for me and i tend to always be friends with someone before it turns into like. therefore, cutting out the game factor. either way, from the debacle i witnessed last night, i didn’t miss a thing.

dramatics aside, a night out was actually what i needed to take my mind off of things. no heavy drinking, or mixing of dangerous substances, i just wanted to dance, and that i did. that i did. in my new green dress too.

on an unrelated note, england doesn’t have air conditioning in a lot of the main shopping centres. shopping on a saturday was absolutely hideous in 25 degree weather. yet, a beer garden for lunch and mint chocolate chip ice cream had while laying in the sun (shade with my sunglasses) was divine.

i got my first birthday card today, from my gran, accompanied with a nice long letter…best kinds of cards are the ones where pages of foolscap come tumbling out, don’t you think?

the news from home keeps coming in positive, the move from the hospital back home was the biggest step. its amazing how the tide can shift in a week. it just makes you realize life is too short to be arguing and fighting over the frivolous.

today was good. i hope everyone else’s was too.

Saw this over at Barbara’s and thought I’d play along. I’m taking out the rules and the tagging part, as I figure if you wish to play along, you will. However, as with Barb’s there is 1 question in the bunch which did not come with the tag…can you guess my question?

1. Who is your all-time inspiration?
Tough one. As there are numerous people in my life that inspire me, I’m going to go the fictional route here and say the Chesire Cat from Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland.

2. Do you sleep with your wardrobe doors open, or closed?
Closed, and this applies to any other hinged pieces of wood.

3. If you were stranded on a deserted island, who are the three blog buddies you’d take with you and why?
1) Todd because even on a deserted island a dose of tough love is always appreciated.
2) 668 because clowns can be considered protection in the unknown.
3) Barbara because she’s one of the cool kids and doesn’t even know it. Plus she makes me laugh on a daily basis, and I believe her knowledge of Radiohead facts may come in handy at storytelling time.

4. Where is the place you want to go to the most?
Anywhere away from British boys. They’re all twats.

5. If you could have one dream come true, what would it be?
I dream some pretty random and interesting things but, it’d have to be my most recurring one where I’m in a bowl of cheerios floating in milk. I imagine it’d be good for the skin.

6. Do you believe in seeing a rainbow after the rain?
Yes, sometimes they can be magically delicious too.

7. What are you most afraid of losing right now?
My metro pass, it keeps falling out of my wallet.

8. If you win one million dollars what would you do?
Pay off all my student debts, my brothers, my parents mortgage, and my friends debts as well. Take friends and family on a holiday. Buy a lot of technological gadgets. Travel. Invest in the bookstore/gallery aka The Flying Buttress.

9. If/when you meet somebody that you love, would you confess it to him/her?
I’m assuming you mean when you meet someone of a certain fame? Um, no.

10. Three weird facts about yourself.
Yes, my 100 Things Post was just the tip.

1) I have an odd fascination with stick people
2) I can’t drink tea without sweet & low, so much so I have to turn it down if its offered to me and the stash in my purse isn’t there
3) I can’t walk up stairs, I must run. I always think there is someone at my heels.

11. Which type of person do you hate dislike the most?
People who are exceedingly arrogant.

12. If you have faults, would you rather the people around you point them out to you?
Really depends on who is doing the pointing and if its in a constructive manner. I already have a family who supplies me with non helpful ways of improvement, so I’m good there.

13. What do you think is most important in life?
Questioning, but also knowing when to stop asking and let things be. Its a fine balance.

However, this rule doesn’t apply to commercials where the food comes to life – I will forever question that.

14. Are you a shopaholic?
Not really. More of a chronic window gazer.

15. State one of your desires.
To fall in love.

Awwwwwwwwwww.

16. Which part of your character would you like to change?
The always on peacemaker part and the part I’d where I blame myself for everything. Okay, so two parts I’d like to change. Yet I’m learning that sometimes people are just assholes and can’t do nothing ’bout that.

17. What have you been putting off doing lately?
Everything: filling out job applications, dissertation work, laundry.

18. 2+2 =?
Is 4. Sorry, I don’t understand mathematical humour.

19. Describe yourself in three words.
A sad jester.

I’ve been listening to a lot of Coldplay lately. I’m not really the biggest fan, but there is something about their music (minus X&Y) that I find oddly calming. Perhaps because I associate it with a time and place in my life when things were less complicated, or maybe its the way Chris Martin sings on I’ll See You Soon off of Parachutes, I’m not sure, but I’m hooked either way.

What’s been spinning in your stereo lately?

Its my dad’s birthday next Friday, and I have no clue what to get him. He is so incredibly hard to shop for. Although in some ways he is the easiest because he doesn’t do the sentimental gifts that well. Hopefully inspiration comes to me in the next 8 hours because I have to buy it after work to have it mailed for tomorrow. I was thinking about calling overseas and having his cable canceled (especially subscriptions to American news channels) as last time I was home he was turning into a talking head. But that would be more of a gift for my mom.

Anyway, must run and catch my train.

I have so many things to write about but my lids are drooping and the purple that shines under my eyes desperately wants to change to a lighter shade. So instead of writing a proper post, a list of the random things off the surface of my brain to clear my head so I can sleep.

My favourite Clash song is Hateful. Especially at 1.29 in.

I sometimes smile/mumble to myself while I’m walking.

My arm, especially my elbow is killing me at the moment. I tried to switch my load bearing arm from right to left to help relieve the pain while walking home today. I then started walking on a slant. Couldn’t deal with the change. I wonder what would happen if I switched my watch from right wrist to left?

Sliced cucumber with salt is superb.

I went to a book launch today, the author read a chapter from her book. Such a dry and witty humour in her delivery. I hope I retain some of the funny when I’m 80. Having the right wheels will help, methinks.

I was talking computer geek with a co-worker today and it lead to one of the directors of the museum asking my opinion on their website which is under development, I’m supposed to make notes and get to bring them to the design meeting next week. I knew buying that dot com domain and learning how to do things myself would come in handy (more on that another day).

I ordered nachos the other day and the plate arrived with 10 chips, spread out, coated individually with cheese. My old roommate used to individually put cheese on each chip but I’d never seen it done in a restaurant before. Kind of anti climatic. Half the fun of nachos is the hunt for the good chips, its like trail mix. Who cares for the peanuts? I’m on hunt for the raisins, and no, its not the same just buying a package of raisins.

Yet the best part of my day - more good news from home. Everyone was holding their breath this weekend, but things really do seem to be improving. I hope things stay that way.

***

Favourite word as of late?

Mine would be confuddle.

Although I am not, I just enjoy saying words that sound like puddle.

home rang today with good news. the kind of good news that brings your hand to your heart, letting out a sigh of relief. things may not be completely out of the woods yet, but there is definitely a clearing and things are looking up.

so although i’m feeling relived in that sense, i’m feeling a wee bit overwhelmed in other aspects of my life. i need to make a list. a list for the the week, the month, the year…and life, it would seem.

today i was going through correspondence and a letterhead caught my attention - the unicorn bookshop.

one of my dreams (or goals) is to someday own a bookstore/gallery (yes, i have lofty ambitions). anyway, reading the name in the letterhead made my mind wander to what i would one day call said bookshop/gallery. the name of this blog has been a favourite term of mine since i was a teen and first saw the bath abbey in art history class. although “the flying buttress” sounds more like a pub than bookshop. nevertheless, its still a contender in my imagination.

if you could own a shop, what would you sell and what would you name it?

As a good friend once told me, “Your friends don’t need you to be a happy dancing monkey all the time, you know.” So I’m taking a break from entertaining (assuming that I was in fact, doing so) and no longer will I apologize if the content here makes you sad.

Its been a hard weekend. If you’d caught me Friday I was almost jovial at the thought of a three day weekend and excited at the prospects awaiting. But its been bad news after bad news. Not the start to the month I was hoping for. However, if this weekend has taught me anything maybe everything had to happen so I could wake up.

Song of the Minute: Violet Hill - Coldplay (worth a click)

“The chaplain wants you to let them send you home,” Major Danby remarked.

“The chaplain can jump in the lake.”

“Oh dear.” Major Danby sighed, shaking his head in regretful disappointment. “He’s afraid he might have influenced you.”

“He didn’t influence me. You know what I might do? I might stay right here in this hospital bed and vegetate. I could vegetate very comfortably right here and let other people make decisions.”

“You must make decisions” Major Danby disagreed. “A person can’t live like a vegetable.”

“Why not?”

A distant warm look entered Major Danby’s eyes. “It must be nice to live like a vegetable,” he conceded wistfully.

“It’s lousy,” answered Yossarian.

“No, it must be very pleasant to be free from all this doubt and pressure,” insisted Major Danby. “I think I’d like to live like a vegetable and make no important decisions.”

“What kind of vegetable, Danby?”

“A cucumber or a carrot.”

“What kind of cucumber? A good one or a bad one?”

“Oh, a good one, of course.”

“They’d cut you off in your prime and slice you up for a salad.”

Major Danby’s face fell. “A poor one, then.”

“They’d let you rot and use you for fertilizer to help the good ones grow.”

“I guess I don’t want to live like a vegetable, then,” said Major Danby with a smile of sad resignation.

Catch-22, Joseph Heller

Why is it when I really need to talk no one is home. I need to make friends with more single people.

I got some bad news this evening, but I don’t know how to process it. I keep removing tears from the bridge of my nose and letting the water drop onto my sheets. Making a haphazard polka dot mess.

I got up early this morning, went to the gym and got my hair cut. Was going to go to the cinema but decided against it, have to save something for a lazy Sunday. I didn’t get my bangs cut on a slant, which is new for me. Having short hair I use my bangs to hide behind so I feel rather exposed but perhaps the sun will have a better chance of colouring me now.

Its exam period for the undergrads this month, which means the library is packed. I’m glad I was up early and got here before noon. Otherwise I’d be nestled between the stacks, and I’ve done enough of that this week.

Yesterday I was condition checking these story/knowledge books from the 60s. Illustrations were quite comical, and as we were going through them my co-worker (who is from Estonia) asked me if there are any typical Canadian stories/myths/legends. He went on to share tales from his culture, explaining the myths. Now when I was asked that question, I completely blanked. The only thing I could recall were a few First Nations stories, but even those I had trouble recalling exactly.

Do these stories exist and I’ve just forgotten them? Or do you think there can be such an “overall” story for our nation? Or, any nation, really. I think this question is easier to answer for other countries, that are not your own. Although they’d most likely be false.

Hope everyone is having a good weekend.

I know winter months can lead to sadness, but there is a little comfort to curling up inside to escape the cold. In the spring when the sun graces us a little longer its hard to rationalize that feeling, and I’d like to be outside, just wish I had a hand to hold. Jealous, I am, but such is life.

This week has been a bit up and down, although I’m not necessarily writing about it. Family stuff going on (not about my brother for once) and a few other woes but silver linings…two great albums leaked this week: Death Cab For Cutie - Narrow Stairs & Wolf Parade - At Mount Zoomer.

I’ve been spinning Wolf Parade all week, just putting my ear to Death Cab For Cutie this evening, but I know songs from each will be making my year end list. Here’s a taste.

The Grey Estates - Wolf Parade

No Sunlight - Death Cab For Cutie

Its a long weekend here, Bank holiday on Monday. I was really surprised (and somewhat confused) that the Brits don’t celebrate Victoria Day like Canadians do in May. There is another Bank holiday at the end of the month, but not associated. Weirdness.

Today I discovered that beer garden is slang for outdoor patio. Seems logical but I’d never put the two together. Oh, and more signage I kept meaning to post. From my local chippy. Few interesting things on the menu, eh? What would you order? Personally, I’m intrigued by this Fitter Spam and Pineapple Ring. Yum. :S

Have you ever had a dream where you’re reading letters, emails or books? I think because I write so much in a given day that its common reading text seeps into my sleep.

I had a rather odd dream last night where I was reading a stack of letters that had come in the post, but they weren’t really even letters, more like little quotations and they were all very ominous. Kind of strange.

Oh yes, and now my bathroom ceiling is leaking, hard core. This means Laundry Sink Girl has been up to her old tricks. I think I should invest in plastic covering for everything in my room.